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Jimmy Kimmel spent Thursday afternoon in a Twitter feud with Roy Moore, the Republican Senate candidate in Alabama, after sending a character from his show down to disrupt one of Mr. Moore’s rallies. On that evening’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” he responded to a tweet from Mr. Moore suggesting that if Mr. Kimmel wanted “to mock our Christian values,” he should go to Alabama to do it.
“It doesn’t fit your stereotype, but I happen to be a Christian too. I made my first holy communion, I was confirmed, I pray, I support my church, one of my closest friends is a priest, I baptized my children. Christian is actually my middle name. I know that’s shocking, but it’s true. So if you’re open to, when we sit down, I will share with you what I learned at my church. At my church, forcing yourself on underaged girls is a no-no. Some even consider it to be a sin.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
Mr. Kimmel said he was spoiling for a fight with Mr. Moore.
“Maybe when you say, ‘Come down to Alabama and we’ll do it man to man,’ maybe that means you’re challenging me to a fight, which is kind of what it sounds like. And if you are, I accept, by the way. I accept that invitation. There is no one I would love to fight more than you. I will put my Christian values aside, just for you and for that fight.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
Meyers Says Lauer Played a Crass Game with His Career
Seth Meyers, like most late-night hosts, spent a sizable amount of time on Matt Lauer’s sexual harassment scandal.
“Lauer ‘would sometimes quiz female producers about who they’d slept with, offering to trade names. And he loved to engage in a crass quiz game with men and women in the office: ‘[expletive], Marry or Kill,’ in which he would identify the female co-hosts that he’d most like to sleep with. Well, I don’t know who you said you’d marry in those conversations, but I do know you killed your career.” — SETH MEYERS, quoting a report in Variety
Colbert Introduces a New Trickle-Down Theory
Stephen Colbert made it clear he doesn’t think much of the Republican tax bill that could soon be passed by Congress.
“After months of clenching and pushing, it looks like the Republicans may finally pinch out a steaming loaf of legislation.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“According to the C.B.O., ‘by 2027, people making $40,000 to $50,000 would pay a combined $5.3 billion more in taxes, while the group earning $1 million or more would get a $5.8 billion cut.’ But don’t worry, that $5.8 billion will trickle down — to the rich when they throw their money in the air and dance underneath it for joy! Woo! Woo!” — STEPHEN COLBERT, quoting a report in The New York Times
The Punchiest Punchlines (Springer Edition)
“Jerry Springer says he won’t run for governor of Ohio next year. You know politics has gotten messy when Jerry Springer says, ‘I can’t be associated with this.’” — JIMMY FALLON
“American Airlines recently experienced a computer glitch that allowed all of the company’s pilots to request Christmas off. Said Spirit Airlines: ‘Whoa, whoa, whoa, you guys have computers?’” — SETH MEYERS
The Bits Worth Watching
Some of Jimmy Fallon’s fans sent him stories of their “decoration disasters.”
The members of the Korean pop group BTS played James Corden’s game Flinch. Most of them were terrible at it.
Enjoy the Weekend
The Times Late-Night Comedy Committee will be right back here on Tuesday.
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